my uncle’s grief

I never saw my uncle get emotional.

Not this particular uncle anyways.

He is one of my father’s brothers. He is the closest to my Lola and maybe the most spoiled! He lives with lola and is still unmarried. When I see him, I wonder what will happen if my lola passes away.

Death is an inevitable circumstance in life. And although I know by faith any sickness or disease can be healed…I also know that by faith I must hold on to the promise that once this life passes, greater things are prepared for us in the other life… How can we get there if we refuse to let go of what we have here?

This morning, while on my way to work, I passed by my lola’s compound where my “bachelor-forever uncle lives”, He offered to give me a ride to The Fort so i can get a cab there going to work. After that, one topic of discussion led to another…never saw him this serious before.

“I cannot live without her… I don’t think I’m ready…I don’t think I can…(reffering to my lola)

(he pauses)

Ayeen, (Uncle looks at me)… after 39 long years of calling someone Mother, how can I ever be used to the reality that I can never call someone that word again?” My uncle said, his voice dripping with sadness that left me numb and dumbfounded…

I could not answer him. I just looked at him and then looked straight ahead…

” I envy those who still have their mom and dads…I am jealous of your tito martel, he still has your lolo and lola” He said driving a bit faster. He was not looking at me anymore…(Tito martel is his first cousin.

I told him life and death was a reality… He said he wished that nobody dies… I tried to joke about it saying that if that is the case then maybe the world will pile up with people living on ultra high condos and stuff… but he found my joke to be out of place, and so maybe that was why he kept silent… I think I was out of line too, but I did not know what to say..I should have just prayed silently before I opened my mouth.

“Trust the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5

Now, I think I’ll just sit back and just pray… let God take care of the rest…my uncle, my emotions, my grandmother… This I pray.